♥

im about to explode.
i think about shopping all the time.
i am goin ballistic,seriously.
i cant wait for school to start.
i cant wait to get attachments over and done with.
i cant wait to pass out.
BUT i dont wanna grow old.
i wanna stay this way,forever.
im gettin excited over the slightest things.
like today,i was excited when a demented auntie hugged me.
for example, yesterday, i was excited when i found out that my comp is back alive.
another one, the day before ydae, i was excited because i could meet aidil.
and for the rest of days that i was excited, i was freaggin excited!
HAHA. ok, for those who didnt understand what i wrote, congratulations!
we are in the same boat. *rolleyes*
SEEEEEE, it came to a point where everything that happened to me excites me.
i think i am deprived of life. and i cant wait for retail theraphy.
URGH. this is bad.
OK. sara just msged me on msn.
n ive got a feelin that the bitchins gonna end late. i miss my girls in school tho.
i miss cafe food laaa.
SEE DEARRR, i love food and i cant deny.
gone case already laa ok.
ohyah, daddy just bot meimei a NEW acer lappie.
i am jealous.
but at least, i have one lesser person to fight for the comp with.
just hope that daddy buys mommy hers too. so i dont haf ta fight with anyone!
YAYNESS. hahaha.
*crossesfingers*

ok good nite. aidil is so cruel.
so cruel.but i love him. HEEEE.
best nye love love ni seme.
WOOOHOOOOHOOO.
okkk,ana mentel!
((:

♥

i adore food more.


dipping my fries into the chillisauce is just sheer but simple pleasure.
i like fries with loads of chillisauce and mayonnaise.but mommy bein a health freak saed that we shudnt have mayonnaise at home cause i think she noticed my obsession for the milky thick guey paste which tastes soooo good. but nontheless, i am more than pleased to just settle with the chillisauce. i adore food more than i adore aidil and when im faced with food, nothing else matters. food makes me happy. and my favourite food makes me even more happier! ((:

ive been told by the doctor to lose some 15 extra kilos to be prettier. on the otherhand, ive been told by manymany people that i look very happy in my current weight status. (which is, for your information,OVERWEIGHT.) i mean, ok. i do really wanna be thin. because the last time i remembered myself being thin and slim was when i was 10 years old. and that was before puberty hit me and that was when my breasts werent protuding and ohhhh yah, that was when i told myself that BOYS SUX & GIRLS RULE. so it was eons ago. but but the thing is, I LOVE FOOD. how the hell do you justify that? i feel like i am the only one whos goin through this because most of my friends do succeed in their ikatperut antics. like, they succeed in NOT eating for the whole day except for drinkin milo and chewin on TASTELESS biscuits. like, i am just so sorry, I CANT DO THAT. and yes, mommy has told me to cut on my carbs. because unknowingly, i have a fetish for carbs like bread and rice too. come to think of it, i do have alot of fetishes. oh wells. i shall drop it. SIGHS. anyone wants to pay for my lipo? HUUUHUUU.

okie, skippin on. im totally sorry for the absence because it seems that my computer system died on me. like, what the fuck. and there was one time, i was happily typin when the computer just shut. and the fuckiest thing is, it decided to remain that way for a very long time. like, HEELLO? -shakeshead- so now, i am just more than pleased that i can blog again.
-jumpsaround-

so heres 3 MAJOR events that happened ;

(1) im officially a sgh-ette. (!!!!) and realised that me and rena are gonna be colleagues in the near future! thats exciting! i love my nemooo. MWAH.

(2) my prischool friend died. i remembered playin hopscotch with her and its just shockin to realise that she no longer is in this world. dint managed to visit but then, i think a fatehah would do. Rest In Peace, Dear.

(3) snipped my hair short. decided that i was bored with long lustrous hair. KWANG. or rather, i was just bored. ((: and yes, if i were to be bored too many times, you would find me bald. and i am seriously considering goin bald. i know i could take it. but i dunnoe if aidil can. HOOOOOHoo.

for minorminor snips, aidil sang to me when we argued yesterday. that was the bomb laa. and yah,bein the crybaby that i am, i teared in front of him and there goes my mascara and eyeliner. i went home lookin like some goth girl on the loose. but the fact that he sang just makes my knees go weak.
and he chose my favourite prischool song; I'll Never Break Your Heart.
it was contradictory ydae but fuck, i was enjoying how he looked like a sick puppy and i just had to forgave him. besides, the other girl wasnt even pretty. -shrugs- he would totally slapped me on my forehead if he knew i told the rest of the world that he sang. but i dont care. HAHA.

okie. theres gonna be hanyut& erlin montel tonight. i LOVEEEE ITTTT.
its been quite some time since i last watched both the series. so im excited.
and im thinkin of buyin a psp. i know macam terlambat sikit laa. but i like it laaa. tak salah per display pat bilik. hahah. because im not a affluent gamer so maybe i might just appreciate the video features. but hells excited on startin the shoppin spree on the 8thapril weekend. oh yah, wanna bring mommy daddy and meimei to ramen ten for dinner sometime around that time too. its been too long since we last went out. the last time was when yayi died. hmph,dunnoe if its considered as an outing even. so hells. shall reserved places also in case the crowd gets too crowdy. (!!) haha.

ok. i wanna lie on the sofa and watch mr bean do stupid things. its good theraphy to be larfing at another's life. so i shall larf larf and kick my legs in the air. WOOOHOO.

mwah people! lop lop.
<3.

♥

when i thought i was retarded & weird,


my boyfriend is wayyyyyyyy worst .







haha.

LAME.

♥

hmph. i woke up today with daddy screamin at me to wake up.
because, SGH SENT ME A LETTER!! & of course,i am accepted.
and it is fuckin motivating laa. like, i dont haf to work and all i need to do is,study harder.
because i know i studied hard. so im gonna study harder.
next on my list of TO ACCOMPLISH list, to get my ass into poly. and with detailed calculations, i predict myself to be in poly at the age of 22. which is a nice age to be. and being 22 in poly means that ill be in school with the hip and the hop kids.prolly kids 4 years my junior. and im sure there will be competition because kids these days are waaayyy smarter. but dont worry, kakak will be better than them. *laughsoutloud* insyallah.

and im in a kawinkawin mood. but im gonna list down a number of things which i wanna do before geddin hitched. -smiles-

1) finish my nursing course at college east. ( 1 year)
2) serve SGH bond (2 years)
3) diploma in nursing ( 3 years )

in poly, prolly get another hospital bond with KKH.
4) serve KKH bond( 3 years)

that adds up to a magnificent NINE YEARS in the healthcare industry. i think a decade of hospital work is enough for me. and then, ill do something else. ((: and after everythin else is stable, and if aidil is still in my life, WE WILL GET HITCHED. but if hes not, ill be a rich single taitai. ((: sounds good to me! harhar. and i can take care of both of my folks. which is even better!! YOOHOOOOO.

but nonetheless,
so lets do simple calculations here.

im turning 19 this year.

19+ 9= 28

conclusion; ill only be geddin hitched AFTER the age of 28. nevermind if i cant ged my own kids. im thinkin of adoptin anyway. prolly 2 kids.
one from myanmar and another from the philipines.
since everybody saed that i looked like i am from the philipines. *rolleyes*
but i love it cause it shows that i dont look minahminah. well,im not even malay in the first place.
harhar! *smilesbroadly*

but maybe, ill adopt a kid from africa. so ill ged to be a mother to a BLACK kid.
niggaaaa shit laaaa ok! I LOIKE. and im sure Lyn will support me fully considerin our loves for detroitshit/niggashit people.

but then again bein a very indecisive brat, i dont think im gonna settle for just a diploma. nowadays, diploma is nothing. so yah, we will see.

maybe i may not want to get myself married even. i may just wanna remain single and then adopt kids. WHICH IS A GOOD THING. so at least i dont haf to worry if my marriage goes haywire because i will haf the kids ALL TO MYSELF. yah yah,im selfish too. harhar.
so im gonna work harder and harder to get myself into uni. and then, work for a couple of years, kumpulkumpul duit, send both my folks for a tour and then, retire at the age of 40. ((:

but wait, 40 is wayyyy too early to retire. mommy is 50 and she is still studying. so maybe i should follow her footsteps. URGH. seriously, why cant God just tell us what to do, so we dont have to make decisions? hmph, but then again, who the hell i am, to question God.

and speakin of God, im in a Msn conference with farra all the way from vancouver, discussing God, Repent and the Quran. something that we obviously dont talk about very often. but i liked it cause its very upliftin. and i know some people tell me straight into my face that im a two-faced bimbobrat because i love clubbin and still, think of God. but then again, who are you to judge me.
i can publicly declare that i think of God everyday and ive faith in Him. but i still club. like, get it?

okie.i should stop bein a bimbobrat and stop typin already. it looks like some composition off a GP paper. which is not good. cause i am so not nearrrrr there.

hmph. the weekends are closing on me. and i wish u people haf a great week ahead!
MWAH. love love.

now, off to buggin Aidil to wake up.
hurs.
toodles.

♥

got into a huge fight with aidil a few nights ago.
it was massive because i blew it up. and he was boldly accused of cheating.
frankly, there's still a small tinge of me which still thinks that he is cheating.
but i guess, i rather not think about it.
lets just say that im in a gargantuan denial balloon.

for fuckin father's sake, it might pop soon but im holdin my breath. -smiles-

furthermore, ironically, the very next day, we went out for Ramen Ten & a movie.

& we fell in love again.

and i even remembered us holding & swingin our hands like amateur childhood lovers, laughing our hearts out at the restaurant and making everyone else stare.
but i love it when everyone sees how happy i am.
hmph, thats another irony.

okie. im shagged from abg man's wedding just now. bein the blurcock chingchong ding dong, i only knew of the weddin, last night. and kak nurrul is the pretties minah tudung bride ive ever seen. and bein part of the wedding, means that im with the makcikmakcik. and of course the huge M word came out,again. & when i carried Nurin in my arms, everyone thought that i was married. and that she was my kid,of course. Gawd. and when i told them that im not married, they popped the stupid question. *rolleyes*

TAK DAPAT LA AKU NAK KAWINN!!! -screams-
for those curious cats out there, i do wanna accomplish afew things before getting hitched.
& that includes , A LIPO. which should be a major thing. & that also includes tryin out for a airline. & that is AFTER the successful lipo. WOW, anganangan aku besar yer.

setinggi gunung,seluas laut orang duludulu kater.

ok ok,im kidding(about the airline thingy,of coz!). kwangs.

i felt like pullin out my hair. and you noe whats more, when i talked to my senile granny, she told me she had two husbands! *shrugs* she even told me the names. and guess what, both names belong to my late grandfather. as in one was his real name and one was his nickname! and she told me that she had TWO HUSBANDS. *pullsoutmorehair* GRRRR .

its always like that whenever there is a wedding. or rather, its always like that when the whole family gathers. my family is weird. none of my cousins are married and none of us are even thinkin of marriage and i think its gonna stay that way for a long time despite us changin boyfriends/girlfriends like changin panties or boxers. it works either way dependin if ur a girl or a guy. or it doesnt matter at all for some people in the family. HAHA. -rolleyes-

okok,ive made my point so ill take my leave. aidil is busy enjoyin his bachelor party at pasir ris. just hope that they dont engage hookers to entertain themselves. and if that doesnt happen,ill be more than pleased ((:

LOVE.

♥

LOVE FATE & FIGHTS.

its ironic or rather comical that you are capable of falling in love with a person whom never once even crossed your mind. and how can u sit back and reminisce at all the wonderful, if not precious time, uve spent with each other and be indulged in a heated argument the second after.
HARHAR, i can really lie on my bed, with my legs swingin up high and giggle to myself how ive landed myself with my ex-boyfriend's neighbour. and for a blardy tiny winy fact, that i met him several years ago without realising, is another joke,all my itself.

also, on the otherhand, i know we cant stand each other.
ive come to terms with it;
that he finds me very very fuckin irritating at times and even though, that realisation/acceptance of that fuckin fact is such a hideous slap on my ego. and i know of times where i just feel like ripping his head off or biting his ears off because he irritates the living hell out of me also. and how we resort to shootin mendacious& merciless allegations just to appease our alter egos. and its again, another irony, how we can cuddle and literally, kiss& make up,the second after. & how my significant other thinks that im always on hiatus and im always very capable of producin patterns of loveyou,missyou-hateyou,fuckoff antics altogether in a week.

but that aside, how he is able to love me despite my excess baggages and despite still gainin the extras. and how he still pampers me with weekly door surprises despite me shouting at him like a fuckin madwoman on the phone,sumtymes. & how i know i cant stand him when he talks about his girl bestfriend because I WANT TO BE HIS ONLY BESTFRIEND. & how i feel like hitting his head with my head in attempt that he could understand what im tryin to say. because i do realise that sometimes i talk in circles. *rolleyes* & how he hurt me when he tells his friends that hes talking to a friend
when hes talking to me, HIS GIRLFRIEND.

ohh yah, how he hates me goin clubbin but how i lorve clubbin with my girls and how i adore the nightlife while he wants me to stay home fullstop. & how he hates reggaeton but i love it despite it singin phrases of a total alien language which i cant comprehend. how i love chickflicks n how he hates it because he thinks it makes me more bimbotic. & how i hate it when i prioritise him before anyone else but he has another two women above me. *rolleyes*

and yes, its true that i can give him a hundred and one reason to ask him to fuckspider/leaveme but i wont.

cause i love him alil too much.

cause hes alil more precious than a million words can say.

& b, you're all that i ever have, want & need .

EVER.


--- Aidil.
my ex-boyfriend's neighbour,
who is now, the love of my life.

xoxo.

♥

i didnt have the energy to blog last night after i got home because i was too shagged.
i felt like my energy's been sucked outta my body.
and yesterday's outing was the first in many weeks of work.
so i was subber excited to meet Lyn. but i was late,again. because we agreed to meet at 5 but i woke up at 4. and i kelamkabutly got ready.
& when i met Lyn at dhobyghaut, she was nicely snugged at a corner, with her PSP.
oklah, i am so jealous because she has got that thing which can play vids, songs & games.
and also, she has BURNOUT. -rolleyes- i am not a gamefreak but i like burnout. i dont even mind losing to Aidil's nephew who is much much younger than me. ive got a face of an elephant. so i dont mind ((:

and yah so, we met. and the first question, "Kau dah makan?" kwangs. so we went to orchard to have late late lunch because both of us were starving like idiotic dayakpeople. and we ate at burgerking. yes, after so long of kfcs with aidil, i finally tasted mushroomswiss and it was so much nicer than how i remembered it used to taste. hmph,maybe its the company. and having food right in front of our face, we did the next best thing of course! -BITCH. i really felt her and yah, maybe im just as affected as her like how aidil saed i feel too much for my friends. but i guess, if ur girlfriend were to be stuck in a trench not capable of coming out, you feel the pain, you feel the pinch. thats how its like, dear. but hopefully the tides will change because u noe how people say that time&tide wait for no man. n yah, ill be there. despite the hectic workschedule.

anyways, after the mushroomswiss-es, we waited for bobo outside the oldchangkee thingy and then, guess who i saw laaa! i like my eyes and even tho the optical person saed tt i no longer have perfect vision,i still think i do have perfect vision because i spotted her like manymany metres away,across the road, crowded with people. so, i do have perfect vision.
(denial la can?!) heee. and yah, i saw Ain.she was with razin.
so i ran(yes,aidil, i RAN. dont believe ask Lyn.) and hugged her.because dah lamer tak jumper mah. heee.so we walked to Lyn n then,razin saw the PSP. so of course, he took over and then, we together-gether waited for bobo. he looks good,as usual and yah, i didnt realise that he was *that* tall til yesterday. & then, both me & lyn had our second biddings; fried wantons. and still were bitching. and i think bobo cudnt stand the two of us because he had this very blank look on his face. maybe he tot that it wasnt glamourous for a good-lookin guy like him to be larfin his heart out like we do in public.

after our food, me bobo & Lyn walked around in search for my A blingbling but it seems that the shop wasnt selling it already. it was so sad laa. like, when i didnt have the money, it was sitting there nicely starin at me as if luring me to buy it but when ive got the cash, its prolly on sumone else's neck. Nilah aku cakap, tak jodoh langsung. so we walked and walked and bobo mentioned sumthin about mars bars. & its fried mars bar. ok,ok, i am a gundu so ive never heard of it but it sounded yummy cause its MARBARS! so bobo & Lyn bought the fried mars bars & me & Lyn shared a packet of crispy chicken. which tasted good but smelled like diapers of an ahpek's. it was so distinct. but it was good. -rolleyes- & we had farn sittin by the sidewalk, talkin & snipping& oh yah, eating.

the whole food thingy ended when our food finished and i really should recommend you guys to try the fried mars bars. because they haf icecream underneath the balls and it really melts in your mouth. but YUMYUM. i like. & off we went to marina because lyn wanted to sit at the long stretch of stairs. i seriously dunnoe whats her fuckin motive of doin that because i thought that we would look like anak terbiar. but yah, i just went along for fun. & halfway, sabirin wanted to meet us. i was estatic laa! hes my cousin though but its been a longlong time since we last met and he wasnt even there for my yayi's funeral. so yah. we met and munshid was there. we bought more junk at 7-11s and munshid went off. and so we sat there til 11 plus because everybody had to go home. like, DUH. & i had to work. like, DUH.

& speaking of work,im on the afternoon shift today. & i haven ironed my uniform yet.but ill do it later. TEEHEEE. and aidil's havin his interview now at daddy's workplace. im so hoping that they would bumped into each other though. & yah, good luck to him. i mean,im sure he'll get that place. im just gonna pray for him. and do alil of crossing fingers! *smiles* it works ok.

ok, im gna leave you guys with afew pics. of prolly my fav people. n its amusing to know that we all graduated from the BengWanPri six years ago. *chuckles* KWANG. like ive saed before, its farny how fate works. ((: but i like it.


LYN&ME&PSP


US&AHMAD BOHARI (:


SAB&ME *


xoxo.LOVES.

♥

ive finally got leisure time. *phew.
today,im lettin loose and Me&Lyn are hittin the streets.
like,finally. *rolleyes*

also, i wanna make it clear that for my wedding,ive gotten myself my own bubbleblower & wedding singer. *jumpsaround*

YAYNESS. things are beginnin to take shape.
i am so glad. so today,i shall enjoy myself.
oh did i say that, today's date with Lyn is a pig out date?
Hmph. of course, MY favourite.
-yumyum-

Lyn,AKU SAYANG KAU DEEPDEEP.
cant wait to see you laaaaaaaa.
mwah.

kalah aidil tau!!!.

♥

RE: TYPICAL MRT TRAIN RIDES

heads always turn when me&my classmates all decked in nursing uniforms enter the train cabin. some look with alot of curiousity and some looked with total awe. it could be a good thing, or a bad thing;depends on how u look at it,really. for me personally, im selfish by nature and even though ive realised that nursing is a selfless profession, there's still a tingey whiney part of me which disagrees.

like, i dont like it when i get a seat in the train and middle-aged man&women give gunshot stares at me as if i did something sinful. just because i am a nurse and i am supposed to be compassionate to the people of the world. -rolleyes-
I TOTALLY DISAGREE LAA. like, me& you have got an equal chance of a seat and here,on the world wide web,i would like to say that, i would NOT give up my seat unless i see a pregnant lady, a very very old man/ woman OR a child. seriously. if u are those office-working people or those veryvery kiasu aunties, I AM SO SORRY. alot of aunties & uncles out there have the word kiasu tattooed right on their foreheads. u can see their gleamin faces when they get a seat after coming into the cabin and rushin for the ONE pathetic seat right at the other end.
MACAM BANGGE GITULAH! -whatever ok-

& i am a sadist. i feel orgasmic seein disappointed faces on these kind of people when they run for that pathetic seat only to have it taken by another kiasu-ist and how i wish i could laugh right into their faces. i mean, theres nothing fuckin wrong with wantin to rest our asses after a hard day's work. and its only human nature to be selfish (like me!) but you dont have to do it to the extreme. be graceful singaporeans; smile. and if u smile, u find yourself feeling very light.
go try it, im serious! and even though i am a nurse, and i am supposed to be considerate, i am just sorry that i wont give up my seat to kiasu wannabes. i like seeing you suffer la. like, its a boxofficehit on your ego. i am *this* stubborn & im stickin to what i believe in.



love.