♥

First and foremost, i would like to apologize to anyone who feels offended because i am not talking about the rest of us, i am just refering to this ONE person. so please do not take offence. thank you.

Hahahahahahahahhahahahahha. I feel like laughing everytime i think about what happened.
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA!

korang nak tau aperr? krekrekrekrekrekre. the other day, me ira and kak hid went to mos & we were like having the time of our lives, because we were sooooo hyped that day. and do you know what happened?!! hehe. kiter gadoh dgn bapok la sials. SUMPAH bapok ni fucking ugly, scrowny and very kaninachaoooocheeebye. Ni bukan macam trans melayu kiter seh. ni cine and verrrrry tak terator you know. like the muke WORST than abigail. you know, at least abigail looks good when she smiles. THIS ONE?!!! Sialllahhhh cannot make it sials. muke pecah, the face like sandpaper,WORST. the voice sumpahhhh suare katak. So tak terator. I swear she was undevelop. like you see, our kakakkakak melayu, muke lawa2,den very classy looking, very nice to look at, some are friendly but definitely NOT this one.

/anyway, i mean, you guys know that under normal circumstances, i wouldnt insult her the way i am doing right now and i am doing just that because, this bapok macam sial.

okay. sooo i was dancin with Adil and she was tellin me to like look at them la, because very the burok, if u guys see her, you guys wud have agreed. burok muke, den perangai slutty, i cant help but talk you know? so we were talking and then, i think she heard us talkin about her and she turned around and said, " Fat! Fat Fat! You fat!" HAHAH. that was the funniest thing because she just turned arnd and aimed at me, padehal, there was mats everywhere and ALL the mats were talking about her and she just aimed at me, and of course, i laughed la right?!! i was like covering my mouth and then laughin bcz it was funny how she said FAT into my face and then, i think i made her even more agitated when i laughed into her face. BUT that wasnt all sials. she turned around and danced RIGHT into my face! and stepped my feet summore. Dahlah pakai heels, sumpah beli pat pasarmalam den have the cheek to dance in front of my face, like you know, you want to intimidate people that kind? fuckin cibai.

right at this point,i cant take it anymore la. kau dah panggil aku fat, kau makimaki hamon aku, den dancesoooofuggly and then step my feet, fuckin too much right? so i danced behind her and made sure my ass hit her assless-ass. and at this point,ira was already interfering cuz she cannnot stand it when people call me fat and she was shouting, " FUGLY!FUGLY!FUGLYFUGLY!" all the way. and then, the bapok turned around and like tolak ira. and then ira tolakkkk back and she wanted to hit us with her fuckin heels,like for what the fuck kan. so we were so agitated i tell you. ira already go to the back and got hold of someone else's jug while i just want to like punch her face or you know, at least pull down her fuckin microskirt. so, i was at the front,being "protected" by this mat. I think he see us like kental because korang kan tau, kiter sumpah bukan gadoh2 punye orang but this too much alrdy. and i just tonyol his head and i think i said sumthing like, " eh mat, saner la. aku nak gadoh!!". WOAH. fuckin kental sial aku. but whatever kan, i dont care. then while that was happening, SHE THREW HER GLASS OF BEER AT US!!!!! geram kan!!

at this point, aku dah tak boleh take it anymore. and the cheek you know, she went up on that drink stand thingy. it isnt even the podium sial. you know smoove's cage? around the cage kan orang boleh surround the cage and then look at pple dance inside and then u can put ur drinks on this long thing? YAH. she climbed up there and danced! KIREKAN KAU DAH TERROR LA? KAU DAH CAMPAK BEER PAT KITE, KAU PANJAT AND STEP MOS TU DIER PUNYE. palapantat. everybody was like booing her. so we went out of smoove and complained to the management. talk and talk and talk and then,brought the bouncer to chase her away but when we came in, she wasnt there anymore. FUCKING COWARD. cheeebyyeee. geram sial aku.

WOAH. geram. geram. we reeked of beer after that. i had to throw my dress okay!! babi. babi. and of course la, we can only bitch about her after that. because orang dier dah takde what,dah tak boleh buat aper2. pantat. if i see her outside, sumpah i will scream FUGLYBAPOK in her face. and yah, wen we were complainin to the management, we refered to that bapok as IT.

cause 'SHE' is too lenient and it sounds pretty. hidop mesti tak selamat, buat budakbudak kental macam kiter marah and gerammm. pantat. and the best part of it, i felt embaressed you know? like, of all people we had to fight in a club and gadoh bukan dgn pompan. gadoh dgn bapok. siallahh,sumpah tak glamour!!! urgh. but yah, it was funny.

i still laugh when i think about it. okay, i gtg. wanna eat my chowderrrrr.

♥

ITS TIME TO PARTYYYYY,

THE WEEEKEEND IS

HEREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

♥

Haha. My Virgin Brows. Told you my pain threshold was nonexistant. Krekre. but i think it will be better, next time round. BILER LAGI SHAZILAAAAA?!!! Kwang. So, people, if u wanna go threading, just go. If I can do it, so can you. Jangan takot, kalau nak pekik, pekik aje. Kiter bayar 6 dollar pe. So we CAN scream and shout in pain. Kalau Aunty tu bising2, complain to higher authority. Haha. But if u think that the Aunty is the higher authority, just whince and screeeammmm with gritted teeth like me, senang cakap, resign to fate ajelah. Think positive. I think Shazila make a very good girlfriend to go threading with. Very supportive and totally, lying to me!!!!!!!!! Which is good la kan. If she told me the truth, i wouldnt go. She told me, that it wasnt painful and it wasnt that bad. PENIPU!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahah. but i forgive u because kening aku ader sikit lawa after that. Haha.

Okay. I gotta get ready for work now. Need to get fags from ShengSiong first. & sorry for the angry entry below. Cannot take it anymore la. Just need to burst out and vent it all across www. Hee. Goodnight people.

♥

Tonight, is my last night. &&&& I cant fucking wait. Enough of the drama. Last night wasnt any much of a difference anyway. I still had to run up and down. & my little pinky toe hurt like mad. Really,really hurt. I feel like its fractured or something. The pain is excruciating when it comes. After 3 nights, i am still timid and i still need my colleague to accompany me to the toilet during the night. I hold my bladder until i cannot tahan, i know its bad but seeeeeerrraaaammmmm eh. So i dont want to take any risks at all. I was very sleepy towards 6am in the morning,and i just felt like bunkin into sister's room and just sleep. But yeah, obviously i cant,with people talking like that?

Tsk. Politics,politics. Sometimes, people should just mind their own business around work. Aku tau lah kau dah pernah buat night shift and i am pretty sure she has this air in her head that she thinks she's better than everyone else but i dont gif a fck if u think that way, because i think everyone is fair. Everyone makes mistakes,including you and stop talking as if u are superior. And its 8.50pm,and my shift hasnt even started officially and you are already giving me that titude AS IF it is my first night. And please eh. We topped up the whole treatment room last night,is it OUR problem if the pints of solutions decreased? Jgn jadi bodoh arh, kater morning and afternoon shift what,dengar2 korang keje tak pakai solutions aper. STUPID SIALS. AND i know, I HAF TO DO IT CAUSE I AM ON NIGHT AND ITS MY DUTY. AND I WILL DO IT DESPITE THE FACT THAT EN LAGI SATU MC. kau pk aku bodoh kape. okaylah,mungkin pade kau aku bodoh. but at least aku tak kerek la sials. fckg cb.

sumpah irritating. ive been very patient. i mean, i dont care if people order me around or boss me around, ask me to do stuffs for them, i will willingly do it if i am free, sumpah i will do la right. but dont talk to me as if i dont do my work and blame on me for sumthing that is obviously NOT my fault. Saline dah habis after afternoon shift, my problem? aku night sials. night aku top up, pagi and petang peh shift pakai saline,kau tak kire? and biler dah habis, kau cakap AKU YANG TAK TOP UP? pehhhh puki. boleh jadi gadoh eh. i dont like being accused.

so tonight, i shall give my best and my all since its my last. i cant wait for my weekend offs. i just want to get away from work.

♥

We lost Lilian last night. I dont know what happened but while i was on break, i had a very heavy twitch in my tummy,as if something was wrong and when i got into the ward, it was empty and saw her mummy sobbing. Rushed into her cubicle and saw them already resuscitating her. Asked Leong and she said it had only been 10minutes. There was still heart rhythms but there wasnt any pulse. Hence, the commencement of CPR. It was scary. Her resuscitation was gore. All 7 of us night staff were around her bed, helping. There was 3 doctors. It was madness. I had to run to 73 like 4 times,to get drugs and sumpah, kaki aku sakit now. & yah,i ran. God. Anw, the resuscitation went on for nearly 2 hours and by then, everybody was shagged. Pronounced death and did last office. Cleaning her up was depressing and i swear i felt like bursting into tears because as we were cleaning her, her mommy came in and out of the cubicle talking to her,as if she was still alive. and my heart ached. God. I wish her family all the best and i believe, that she is calm right now. More calmer than she usually will be.

Hopefully, tonight will be a better night. Insyallah. & yes, ive survived two nights. somehow, i look forward to going home, showering and just sleeping in.

♥

Yay Yay! Im at work right now. Nightttt or what. Its my first night ever since i started working and alhamdulilah, at this point, all is well in ward. Patients are soundly asleep, my other colleagues are all minding their own business, no one is stepping on anyone's tail and thats how i like it. It better stay that way til 8am at least. Insyallahh. Ya tuhan ku..simpatikanlah aku..

Of course i am not skiving riight now, i am on break! Drinking piping hot red bean soup because my period is killing me. Macam nak pecah perot aku. My back hurts. Ive succumbed to plastering the heat pack on my stomach,just to ease the discomfort. I was supposed to meet Iqah since she is also on night but i guess w46 is more chaotic right now. Hee. Alhamdulilah.

Anyway, today was our ward's partehhhh! Sister Chong invited the Director Of Nursing and afew other chief matrons to our party, can you imagine? (sister kan mcm BFF dgn dorang seme.member dpt national president award,masok newspaper babe,of coz wellknown la kan.wahhhlao.) of course la rigght, satu sooo kanchiong. I was soooo neervous i tell you. But i think they were quite impressed with us girls because we did well laaaa kan. I hated the christmas carolling because, sumpah, i sang out of tune and it was SOOOO obvious and yeah, but whatever la rigght. The dk performance was a blast! We end up performing 3 times for 3 different crowds and by then, we were very shagged already. The same thing, over and over again. But it was fun! the food was great! I loved the satay and ohh, i loveeee my christmas gift!!! ((: Pandai dorang choose gift. I love the eye pads and my hp pouch. Soooooo bimbo! Hurhur.

right now, i am feasting on wholemeal biscuits,smoothered with margarine and smuckers' grape! wooohoooooo sedap! no wonder dorang cakap, kalau buat night, mesti gemokkk. asikkk makan aje. Heheeee. but really lah, i neeeeeed food! (:

i wish i have my usbport with me so i can transfer photos of today right now, but i dont. OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

okay. i wanna get back to work right now. ITS COLD!! okay, so long people &
Merry Christmas!

xoxo.

♥

Wahlao. fuckin chibai right. okay, im gonna be vulgar just for the fun of it because it is raining and the weather is cool and i wanna be vulgar. duhhh.

first fuckg chibai thing i discovered the moment i woke up today is, daddy meimei n luq are all going to genting. like, hello??? have some consideration can? its sunday and i am working and even if u are going to genting, boleh kuar umah siang sikit so i dont sakit hati looking at yall go happyhappy holiday while i slog and slave myself at work. -_-

second fuckg chibai thing that i discovered is,i was thrown, was bombblasted over to A1HD. macam tak percaye la right see my name there. goddamnit. when i somehow saw my name there, my palms started sweating. like helllooooooooooooooo? after 5 nearly 6 months of working in B2, u suddenly push me to single rooms?! HOW LIKE THAT. kiwak. i was a lost pusssssy sial. i followed izyan when we checked patient and thattttt, was freaky. and then,during report, izyan secretly wrote me a secretive note, " be prepared for hell today." WAOOOOHHH. thanks la right babe. like as if my armpit not wet enough. -_- but whatever la right. our incharges were assssholes. "---->" only izyan knows what it means and yeah, maybe today is the only day that u dont see me singing and laughin n jumping around. kiwak, pakai tu mask boleh mati or whatt. i hate mask. sumpah. but yah my patients all transplant patients so must berhatihati di jalanraya that kind. stop it eh,i miss lilian. Haha. tu lagi stop it.

THIRD fuckin chibai thing that i discovered is, WHILE I AM AT HOME BORED AND TOTALLY NGANTOK(BCZ THERES NOTHING TO DO, REFER TO 1st CB THING= nobody at home!), aidil is happily enjoying the breeze and good bbq food at east coast. and then, he can got the blardy cheek to tell me, " alah ana, if i know right, i ask you to come seh,so we can eat satay together den can you knw, have wind in our hair." WAHLAO. BLARDYY CHEEK. this is the problem with him. he dont think fast enough. even if i were drop a bombhint right in front of him, he wudnt notice. he is thatttt ignorant. =MEN. wahhhliaoweis. and then, theres this mya girl at the pit who knows me. sapaaaa sialllll mya. and yah, i should have gone cause syasya is there!!!! damn work.damn work.damn work.damn work. damn work. damn work. damn work.

AND THE FOURTH AND THE MOST IMPT FCKG CB THING IS, i am on night tml. 4 NIGHTS OKAY. how the hell am i supposed to tahan. suroh aku main monopoly berjamjam,sampai 7-8 pagi, boleh,sumpah tak ngantok. suroh aku lompatlompat,jogetjoget,dansardansar dengan gfs, bolehhhh,sumpah tak ngantok. TAPI suroh buat night, dgn ward tu macam, yallahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. dahlah aku paranoid. beh kene 4 nights. so yah, be prepared la krg. i am so not ready,really. i am already planning to put my bag in the MO's office instead of the locker room. already planning to sleep in the room instead of the lounge. planning to switch on all lights so i can really seeeeee whats beyond and i am planning videocalls to a whole lot of people. sooooo parteh people, please pick up the phone when i call you okay. alahhhh, kater jiwe whatt. GOD. badan aje besar tapi penakot!

speaking of penakot, do u know whats the bravest thing i did so far?! hahaha. THREADING LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. yup, i threaded my eyebrows. now i look like typical indian minahs. you knoowwww? typical sials aku, long and thin and very curvy. and also very painful. i was screamin and crying when she threaded mine. and shazila cudnt believe her eyes. but its trueeee laaaaaa. my pain threshold is ZERO,nonexistant so yah. i think the auntie was kinda pissed but whatever kan, aku takot so aku pekik and nangis la. sakit sial. mengugat keimanan aku okay. tsk.

okay, my shoulders sakit already and i am sleepy. aidil nak gi swaysway pat tepi pantai,serway laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. iluvvvvvvvvvvvvm.

♥

Do you know that i was this small 20 years ago?

Imagine Mika 20 years down the road. Like me.

Haha. Sumpah Nana akan heart attack.

Okay hush now baby girl,

your godma's gonna go.

Mwahs.

ps: thanks eh nano for ur editing tricks! (: im such a gundu.

♥

" The pursuit of happiness is such a ridiculous phase.

If u pursue happiness, you'll never find it."

it will come,one day.

♥

Sometimes, you just have to walk away

& never look back.

♥

& he lied,again.

♥

After getting back from the airport at only 4am, we headed to Jalan Kayu for supper. or wayyyyy earrrly bfast. I nearly puked in the van and god, with 8 people behind, kecoh madness kape,i cudnt take it. reached home at 5.45am. Bathed with freezing,freezing iced water and slept. & when i say, freezing, i mean, freezing like, as in, when the water touched my skin kan kawankawan, my goosebumps naik ehk. & like as if i wasnt sleepy at all, Naj bugged me to wake up at 6.45AMMM!! for JB. pukkkaaaayyyywak. siannggkape.

tapi kawangatalnakkawinpunyapasal, i woke up unwillingly. Tsk. But it was okay, reached the seamstress's place at nearly 11am, because before that, we were busy eating again at Larkin and sedapppppp eh makanan dier! hah,jakon. So we spent another 2 hours, deciding on " pehten" aper and all the ukorans. & i even tempah one for myself. I dont know how it will turn out. We are so likeee makcik2 u know. And just now was one moment when i really whispered to myself,

"kalau aku slim kann bagoossssssssss..." but too bad. It was just for one moment and the next, i went like, " how the hell they breathe in these sialllssssssssssssss..." macam self-consoling la gitukan. hurhurs.

& i took a photo of me at the market because i want people to know that i do go to the market. only that i walk past them and dont buy anything and i would leave the buying fish and all things bloody and smelly to mummy. heh. but even she dont go to the market so yeah. it runs in the blood, so DONT blame me. and the purpose of telling u guys this because, omfffffg la kan! i was tryin out hantarancalculater for fun and you know my hantaran how much they calculate?! hahahhahaha. so funny la i think. freaggin 5k okay. HELLLLLOOOO? they actually really ask you such questions first? GOD. i feel so cheap. like even Fah's bonus is 3k higher than my calculated hantaran. stupid.

oh anyhoos, i am still mad at aidil. i still think he's selfish and he is being very unfair to me. and yeah, whatever. sumpah i dont want to talk about him cuz it enrages me so much!

we are all going out later. to where, i dont know. kak hid dah der kete so, she's bringing us driving! I want to go jb for seafood again but rashes!! n if u notice really carefully, u can see my left leg with a patch of rashes! yeahh, it is thhhhaaat ugly. tsk.

i am sleeeppppyyyy & hunggrrryyyyyyyyyyyyyy. Argh.

♥

Almost Lover - A Fine Frenzy.

I never want to see you unhappy

I thought you'd want the same for me

Goodbye, my almost lover

Goodbye, my hopeless dream

I'm trying not to think about you

Can't you just let me be?

So long, my luckless romance

My back is turned on you

I should've known you'd bring me heartache

Almost lovers always do

You can only be my almost. Almost, but not there.

♥

This is going to be a very angry and vulgar entry. I dont care if he doesnt even read it. I need to let it all out.

and the best thing kan, aku kene just accept what you say you know?! kau cakap, kau nak gini macam, aku kene ikot. kau cakap, kau tak nak aku gini, aku kene ikot. because kalau aku tak ikot, kau cakap aku macam-macam. tak understanding, tak pikir, tak considerate. aper lagik kau nak ni aidilhaswin. sumpah im doing everything that you want, or think is right. Wheres your understanding on my part?! WHERE? biler aku cakap, kau pentingkan kawan, kau mati2 defend yourself. WORDS ARE CHEAP BABY. CHEAP. tak gune, kau cakap aku penting if, you dont do things to show or tell me that i am important. make sense kan? bodoh,bodohhhhhhhh.

padehal, u meet ur friends like ALL time, for gaming,for jamming,for bola, and when i demand some due attention, you say, " lain hari boleh meet aper." PART MANER YANG KAU PENTINGKAN AKU SIAL KAU BBUAL GINI. there's 24 hours in a day. If i can find fuckin 3 mins, to msg you whether you've eaten or not or just ask you hows your day, ASAL KAU TAKLE BUAT. im dealing with patients, you are dealing with boxes. So you tell me, which is more morally important?! im sick of your excuses and you,basically. i dont care who you go out with anymore, cause at the end of the day, you are just gonna lie to me again. i am sick of the lies and the game.

Until you do something out of the ordinary instead of the usual " hello ana!" msgs,acting macam takde pape, i will ignore you. aidil,the clock is ticking.& i dont care if this relationship go south. because,your presence in my life is pretty much redundant if you continue doing what you do. because i need what i need and you better realise it. I've had enough catering to you. Enough.

Sekarang ni, sayang sayang pun tak gune. why should i spare a thought for you, if you dont spare a thought for mine? dont bother looking for me. you've made me give it all up. obviously, whatever i did for you, wasnt worth your tweeny two cents at all.

AKU MARAH & GERAM.

♥

Baby, it wasnt easy for your mummy

to bring you out to this world,you know?

But she did.

I know your arrival brought her nothing,

but happiness.

& i love you for that.

Everybody, this is

Nuryn Mika Batrisyia.

♥

I AM SO TEMPTED

TO POST A PHOTO OF

BABY N!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The eyes & nose of Nana. What a reprint.

My heart was beating so fast & hard when the nurse was pushin her cart to us.

It was exciting! Alhamdulilah, she is a healthy baby girl,

except that she is under observation right now.

Get well soon, babyyyy! ((;

& finally, i am a godma.Finally ehks.

I raked out baby photos of me and i think i was rather small last time! Seriously. Takkkk tipu seh. Ooooooooooooouhhh, i love babies! Macam nak squeeze2 and campak2! But too bad, cannot. Haha.

Since i cant post photos of Baby N (because Nana wanted to be the first one to welcome N into the cyberworld, since like duhhhh,shes the mother kan!), i shall post photos of myself!

Haha.

xoxo.

♥

Yday was irritating. Had one of the biggest fight with Aidil. I was screaming my head off,at him and surprisingly, he was screaming into my ears too,which wasnt very often cause usually, when i am screaming macam pompan giler, he would be quiet and then, hang up and give me the cold shoulder,which usually work,because afta that, i will calm down and we will be alright after that. BUT, NOTNOT semlm. So, it was a good thing that both of us had separate plans with our friends cause i felt like punching him the moment i heard his voice. suddenly macam, SO IRRITATING! god.

so I attended Milkshake @ MOS. god it was packed! the queue was right up til the coffee club and it was totally madness! luckily, me & ira arrived there early,if nott, i cudnt imagine. Went with Kak Hid,Mas, Aris, Een,Hady,Hafiz & Jaz.Met many other friends/acquaintances inside and yeah, what a rocking,smashin time we had!Ive yet to take the photos from Mas but if i have, i will upload it up here. Post bday parties are always the most fun to me. I remembered mine, i got soooo wasted. God. But last night, it was diff. We got wasted from dancing and being actually,truly tired from dancing. I wasnt highhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh at all. Heh. But that was good.

&& you know what me & ira saw??? MINAHREPS GADOH!!! exciting kan. we actually stopped while walking,just to watch them fight in the middle of the pathway. my heart was beating so fast cause i was abit worried that they might noticed us,staring at them in full awe and wanted to beat us up instead! but of course, it didnt happened cause aku kan penakot, i pulled ira away. haha. they were actually really pulling each other's hair and kicking each other's stomach with their heels and like how egoistic people can get, AFTER they walk away they always tell their posse," pukaymak dier lah. rembat dier peh kepale,pecah sials. sundal peh pompannn." HAHA. okay fine, we get the idea, KAU TERROR. -_-/

but it was hilarious and at the same time, shameful eh. Girls fighting? hello?! what are you girls thinking?! Mak bapak korang mesti sedih. Anak lawa2 tapi, gadoh tendang2 and tariktarik rambot pat tengah jalan. Tsk. Kan tak bagos. Call me shallow but i dont think girls should fight in public. Its ugly when girls fight.

I dont have any idea how it feels to fight in public cause ive never been involved in one but i guess, if EVER, things like this were to happen to me, i would be the first one to squat and then crawl out of the angry mob. I dont want to risk,risking my already-sunken cheekbone to some minah. GOD, thats so tak jambu. like imagine... " Ana, asal muke kau? sape sial pukol? " "Kene rembattttt dgn minahhhh uh. Rabakkk kaperrrs." WAHLAO. sungguh tak style kan. tsk.

okay, im sproutin nonsense. hahha.

& ohhh, at this moment, like, as of right now, my best gf is already in labour!!!! like, greatpain-cervixdilating labourrrr!!!!!! god. i cant wait!!!!!!!!!!! i wanted to be there but then, i guess, i wun be of any help to her at all! i think i would be more kanchiong than her! so i guess,i better keep away,stay home and await her sms! ((:

♥

If the rashes dont subside by Sunday, i'll die. My entire body is covered with rashes! I feel so dirty and disgusting.Its irritating cause even my ear lobes feel itchy. God. This is the first time i've got something involving my skin. I hope the rashes will not spread to my face cause, i take great pain to keep my face pimple and spots free so if i have a single visible rash spot on my face, i will die. I will. I will.

Moooorrrving on..

Anyway, Canon Powershot G9 is sooooooooooooooooo hot! & listen up people! Canon are having their Year-End Sale Promos. So with the bonus and these promotions coming up,ive got every reason to invest into one of these!!! PUKAAYYWAAAKK. but the thing is, i dont handle any electronics well. So, i am abit worried cause its a whoooopinggggg 900dollars! A little hefty for a splurge,dont you think?

why cant money grow on my bed? oh why oh why.

♥

today, a gf of mine told me that i am a self-centred girl who always has to have her way all time.

it hit me like a red,sharp dart. maybe i was alil too rash and a little too impulsive. and dumb to think that way.i am sorry that i was disappointed. and that, it was wrong to say things like that. you know how i am, i let my feelings known the moment it hits me and ive heard that ive got quite a sharp tongue. & i apologize. i just cudnt stand it,brewing into me.

ive got quite a temper and ive got quite a tongue. im too outspoken for my own good. i know its unfair to throw biased accusations at you,even without clarifying first. it was impulsive,on my part. maybe what she said was true.

i always want to have my way,and i know i must and will get it done,my way, by hook or by crook. the worst thing about being stubborn this way is, people do get frustrated with me and yes you guys, i am capable of infuriating people. so yeah.

oh wells. i was at SuperDog alone( face it, i do need some alone-time.it was therapeutic.), indulgin in their chilli cheese dog and with Bling in hand, i was flown away by secret hiphopr&b fantasies that was going thru my mind. Bling is such a great book. I've read it twice and i still am intrigued by the plot, even though this is the third.

Nana came shortly after that and the first thing i noticed was her huge tummy. She had her checkup today and guess what people?! The baby's head has already shifted to her pelvis so, that means, it is anytime soon now! ((: She wants to name her baby, which she thinks, is a girl, Batrisyia or sumthing. I think the name is too garang for a girl la right. Haha. but well well well, i dont have any say in this because like duh, i am not the mother la kan. Kalau aku mak dier boleh la aku seboksebok. So if she wants to name her daughter Batrisyia,i guess the next thing for me to do is to think about how i am gonna call her kid. Takkan nak, "batttt, batttt!" kan? Kaos. i was thinking of "Trish." macam cute tapi, we'll see.

but i was telling Aidil some time ago, "bbbb kalau anak dier pompan kan best kan?!!! kiter boleh pakaikan dier minahleggings and cutepinkflowery dresses and make her wear those cute " MY MOTHAAA IS HOT!!!" underwears! haha." & you know what he say???? sungguh tak supportive lorhhh. "Eh you perasan kenape?!! tu anak dier, bukan anak you! sebokkkk aje." WAHHHHHLAO. ouch eh. walaubagaimanapun, i kan godma dier. tsk. kene la style2 lawa2. bukan selalu tau kawan i nak beranak. TSK.

men are so ignorant and insensitive. ass! they dont feel the excitement of awaiting for a newborn. God should do something about this and make men be the ones who are supposed to get pregnant. hmph! then ill see how you guys deal with strectchmarks and carrying at least 5 excessive kilos of extra baggage everywhere you go. Men just dont get it,do they?

okay, syafa just frnscommed me. frnscomm means, friendster comment. so,in other words, she left me a friendster comment. haha. i know i drama. haha. she ask me when i wanna get married and she said that shes confused whether or not,she should take a step further with her beau. like ive said so many times, if you are with the same person for more than 5 years, you are already somehow married to them so venturing into marriage is just doing doing official and legal. face it la kan. PAH KAU GI KAWINNNN SUAAAAAA! haha. and if you do, hell good for you! i just want my personalised invite! heh.

talking about marriage, Naj is hitching,this coming March. I cant wait. I dont know why everyone around me is getting married la kan. DAHHHH GATALLLL EHKS KORANG. heh. harnys' aug08 and i cant wait for that too. but theres still time to booggggiiieeee dont you think, prettyjawawomannn?!

i know i was supposed to go on hiatus. and i think i misused the word la. at the moment, i dont have any private things to blog about so, i shall still stick to blogger. Soorrry eh lj~ buat penat kau aje, resetkan password aku. Hee.

♥

Will be on hiatus.

I just rediscovered the

"Private Entry" icon on LJ.

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" Fret not, my child. We'll kill them all."

Have any of you watched The Kingdom? I was very angry and upset by the time the movie ended so, i must say that the movie was good. Very good propaganda, and very good insights. There was definitely propaganda twds the Americans since in the first place, it IS an american movie. But watching that movie, also made me realise that its sad to know, there are violent muslims out there, doing the exact same thing in the movie. Thats terrible. Of course, Islam isnt what it is, Violence & Terrorism and as the Crown Prince says, " They must be ashamed that they call themselves Muslims." I read in an Internet article just now, that The Crown Prince and both Foreign & Defence Minister publicly support Anti-Terrorism. Which is good, but why are there still people like these?

& I understood, after Abu Hamza died and he whispered " Fret not,my child. We'll kill them all." to his grandson,seconds before he passed away. Like, of course, it is still going on la right, generations from Abu Hamza, will pass their hatred,anger and resentment on. The grandson is probably only, NINE. and you are already telling him that. When he grows older, OBVIOUSLY the stigma will stay; I hate Americans because they killed my grandfather. It will just go on and on. The hatred will be passed down from generations to generations. And i strongly believe, that sometimes, these kids dont even know why they are angry about. They are just angry because their grandfathers are angry and they made it sound and look like, IT IS OKAY TO BE ANGRY AND KILL ALL WHITE PEOPLE. GOD, that is sad. Sumpah la right, aku neutral in this. Neither US nor Saudi but it is sad when people kill innocent people kan? :(((

I didnt want to watch the movie initially but i am glad Aidil brought me. But of course, when you watch The Kingdom,watch it with a pinch of salt la right. Then, do your own reading. That way, the propaganda dosen work. Ha.& the Crown Prince in the movie is hot la sials. Tskkkkk.

♥

Our ward's theme is HotPink!, RoyalPurple!&SizzzzlinggggSilverrr! We are such a bimbotic ward i tell you. I love our christmas tree the best! Because there are hotpink balls and purple butterflies!!!! & the welcoming piece (the first photo!) which is being put on the nursing counter, is done by me! Looks simple to do kan? But it took me like an hour okay! with the help of kak liza, it turned out prettyyyy!!! & yeah, i stayed back after afternoonshift til abt 1130 just now, just doin the deco for the ward! i am such a sucker for things like these. decos and creative thingsss! macam challenging gitu kan! and Room 30,the venue for our party,will have hotpink and purple chandeliers! HAHAHA.

i have a sneaky thought of kidnapping the chandelier after the party to put it in my room. It is soooooooooooooooo tempting and soooo bimbo i tell you. seriously. I love it.

I am having insecurity & assurance, or rather the lack of it, issues with Aidil. Men can be so irritating sometimes. Maybe this is just one period when we just wanna grab each other by our necks and punch each other. GOD. I seriously felt like doing that just now. Sumpah, tak bedek. I wassss sooooooooooooooooooooo frustrated! URGH. i was kickin in the air and jumping and urgh-arghing myself just now. Can you imagine the amount of anger and irritation that was IN me????????????????????????????? & i didnt take my dinner because of that, no mood. Susah dtg eh Ana tak makan. wahlao. knnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn. but we are okay now i guess.

He just told me that if we marry, i must be good at cookking, cleaning, activities and yahh, like duh, the youknowwhat. WAHLAO. expectations tingggi kape. i dont even set him any expectations loh. but at least now, i have to think about what i need him to be good at kan. GOOD! i can make a list and i shall tell him tml ((: so he also can be stress kan? asik dier stress kan aku aje.

He's always telling me what i must do as his wife loh. " I balik, you takle pekik2 macam pompan giler. You kene senyummmmmmm lebarlebar and gimme water." Macam that movie Winsford Wives. Issit the name of that movie? i forgot already la, yang bini dorang seme robot. Crazyyy loh. SIAO ARH YOU AIDIL. haha. its quite funny when i think about how he talks about it lah. he's more berangan than me and sometimes macam melampau la right. haha.

i just want to stop fighting and you know, be peaceful. we have a Botanic Gardens date coming up and hopefully, that would brighten ourselves up alil bit but sometimes with his ignorance and his lack of vision for the future, IT IS TERRIBLY AND PAINSTAKINGLY TOUGH. -_- .
boy oh boy. Tell me i am not the only girl who feels this way. pfffy. MEN!

Anw, Im on another afternoon tml and a morning on a monday. I tink ill be completely shagged after tml due to lack of sleep! Goodness. Oh fuck. I hate mornings on Mondays. Doing diets on Monday is fuckin irritating, and oh, the monday blues. GOD.

GOD.GOD.